apologies to the few of you who are actually reading this. i have been out of pocket past couple days. it always seems that when things are falling into place the way you want them to life always finds a way to remind you that you've let your guard down....again.
the one thing in life i hate more than anything is being lied to. in my many years in this life I've become a decent judge of someones character and can almost always can tell when i am being lied to. if i don't see it at first then it almost always comes back around and bites that person in the ass and then i see it. it is so easy now days with the inter web for a person to become who ever they choose to be. no one has to ever know the truth unless they want it to be known. i even have multiple accounts on facebook, gmail, yahoo, and on and on. but i have never lied to the people i have met and now are friends with. that's just not the guy i am.
the truth, i shall now tell it. i will no longer hide or be ashamed of the things i have said or done in this short time i have been on the Internet. i play a game on facebook called glory of Rome and have been since may of this year. it took control and consumed my life for many months. the friends you make on this game is like a family after a while and i thin k of them as such. players come and go in the game and that's just part of it.
in august a new player was introduced to us and we welcomed her with open arms as we did with everyone. she took great interest in the game and me being on playing as much as i did decided to take her under my wings and show her what i had learned and also had been taught. she quickly took to the game and as usual i flirted harmlessly with her as i did all the ladies i met at first. most i quickly become friends with and most of the flirting would end, but she always seemed to throw it back to me. the harmless flirting soon turned into more. and everyone in the"family" started to see it. at first i was hesitant to push any farther because she had a husband and kids but i was starting to have feelings for her and one thing led to another and she opened up to me telling me about her real life and the things in it that wasn't right to her.
after that we became much more than friends and took things a step further until it was to late to stop what we were feeling. this is where most people get lost in the story....i fell in love with her. yes a woman who i have only just chatted with. hahaha to shorten the story a bit, we got careless and her husband found out about us. every time it seems like we were meant to be with each other and might actually make it happen something always seems to happen. she had her computer and cell phone taken away from her for a week. eventually he "allowed" her to talk to me. now today he has taken away our only means to communicate.
i have believed everything she has told me. i made sure to remind her constantly not to lie to me just be honest. and after talking with her husband today i promised i would not contact her anymore. this absolutely destroyed me to do this , but she knows what has to be done for us to be together. if i was able to see the truth then it is up to her to be truthful and do what she said she was. if she don't then i have to question my judgement of character.
if i offend any of you then i am sorry but from here til the day i know for sure the truth, DFTA-Don't Fucking Trust Anyone. if i haven't known you for ten years then dint be offended but i don't trust you. this is as truthful as i can be. i won't be walked on again. to you cc i do believe in you and everything we talked about. don't make my love turn to hate. i never lied to you about anything...ever.
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